I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize