A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.