My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
