alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
