He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
