its not stalking. its research.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
