she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
