If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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