It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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