In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
