I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
