I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
