whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize