i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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