I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
