i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize