I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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