i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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