He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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