stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize