i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize