You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
