Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
people are starting to question the shark bite story
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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