I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
