idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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