we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
