Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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