I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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