Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
