Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
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