I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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