Is it because I queefed?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
