i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
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Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
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No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
there is glitter all over my balls
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