Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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