i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize