i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
It's just like the Real World with babies
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
