sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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