I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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