You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
so let's talk penis.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
