Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize