I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
