If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize