all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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