My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize