it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
There r osticjed everywhere
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
