and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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