Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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