is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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