i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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