Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
